


Use Once & Destroy

by comfy3666



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Dysfunctional Relationships, Guilt, Hinata jerks off and thinks about Komaeda, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Unhealthy Relationships, hinata experiences post nut clarity, sadsturbating, thats it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-03
Updated: 2020-09-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:41:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26262829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/comfy3666/pseuds/comfy3666
Summary: Hinata dreams about how he and Komaeda used to be. And then he wakes up.
Relationships: Hinata Hajime/Komaeda Nagito, Kamukura Izuru/Komaeda Nagito (past)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 162





	Use Once & Destroy

**Author's Note:**

> title is named after a song by hole. this is smth rly old i managed to finish off. im going thru some old wips and trying to work on them, so maybe ill actually publish smth again soon! mind the tags, sorry it's pretty short, and thanks for reading <3

_The Servant lay below him, his thin frame completely bare. He was completely vulnerable. Hinata leaned over to set his hands either side of the Servant's neck, lowering himself for a kiss. The Servant didn't waste time on chaste kisses or building up- he went straight for an eager, open mouthed kiss and wrapped his hands into Hinata's long hair._

_This wasn't Hinata's hair._

_Hinata pulled away and glanced back at Komaeda, and his eyes were dark as he mouthed_ I need you, _but what came out of his mouth was "Wake up-"_

It was sometime in the middle of the night when Hinata jolted awake, sweat cooling on his forehead. His dick ached for attention, but he buried his face in his hands. 

_He shouldn't have been thinking that way about Komaeda anymore._

Just because they'd slept together once- or a few times- or more than that- while they were in despair, it didn't mean anything. Komaeda had cheerily expressed, in one of his despair spirals, that "he was free to do anything, anything," and "it would be just like old times," but Hinata couldn’t in good conscience accept. 

He could never sleep with Komaeda again. Not after what he'd done to him. How he'd dehumanised him. Used him. And he hadn't even cared. Komaeda had used it to hurt himself. 

He kicked his legs out. His mind kept replaying memories of the Serv- Komaeda's sharp collarbone, the smooth skin of his hips cool under Hinata's hands. And he was all too aware he was still half-hard in his boxers.

_This is wrong of me. This is disgusting._ Hinata gave a short, frustrated groan. He shouldn't have been getting turned on by those memories, they couldn't mean anything. But he couldn't stop replaying them.

It wasn’t long until he stopped resisting, and he kicked his sheets away and lay back down, pulling his half-hard cock from his boxers. His window was cracked open, and the salty night air drifting in was cool against his flushed skin. 

It had really only been four months since he'd last had sex with Komaeda. But in those four months, so many things had changed. 

He wasn't just Kamukura anymore. He couldn't point silently to his lap and have Komaeda sitting there, eager to service him. He wished he could go about it so differently this time. 

He wanted to really kiss Komaeda this time. Not just an experiment, the discovery of a new sensation. 

In Hinata’s imagination, Komaeda spread his legs and smiled invitingly. The chain on his collar was in Hinata's hand, and he would have pulled the chain to raise Komaeda up for a deep, filthy kiss. 

His hand would have gone to Komaeda's ass to find he had already prepared himself. He was always so eager to make this as easy as possible for him. But Komaeda's love was twisted. Obsessive. Self destructive. It wasn't something he could afford to indulge.

Hinata started slowly pumping his dick, his face twisting slightly and he imagined the grip of his hand was Komaeda's feathery touch. He felt himself stiffen in his hand. He missed Komaeda so much, missed the warmth of having another body near him so badly. He hadn't been able to appreciate it as Kamukura. 

He closed his eyes, summoning up the image of Komaeda on his knees, lips parted around his cock, drooling as he bobbed his head up and down, how his eyes lidded when he took Hinata into his throat, as though he were getting off on it even though he was untouched. Komaeda’s tongue flat against the shaft, how he used to trace the veins with his fingertips, how he moaned around him- 

Hinata sped up his pace, wringing glossy precome from the tip, panting- panting _Komaeda’s_ name, trying to be as quiet as he could, conscious of the half open window- He thought about fucking Komaeda again, but this time he wanted to tell him he loved him and look into his eyes with love instead of nothing, how good it would feel to press his dick into that tight muscle again, just how loud Komaeda could be when Hinata relentlessly hit his prostate, he wanted to make Komaeda feel good, to feel _loved_ \- 

He was so close to coming. Hinata turned his face aside, eyes squeezed shut, imagining Komaeda was riding him, imagining he could lean forward and run his thumbs over his scarred thighs, remembering how each discoloured slash and shining burn on his body felt beneath his fingertips, Komaeda, Komaeda, _Komaeda-_

Hinata shuddered, gasping Komaeda’s name quietly as he came, praying nobody was within hearing range. Not that they had ever been subtle before. He slumped for a moment, catching his breath. Sweat cooled on his forehead. All at once, the guilt hit. He rolled over, grabbing a handful of tissues from his bedside and cleaning himself off, wincing at how sensitive he was. He hadn't rubbed one out since… Well. It didn't matter. 

Hinata tossed the dirty tissues into his trash can. He could have used a shower, but he was still trembling. His afterglow was quickly fading, and reality was setting in. He would never hold Komaeda again. If Komaeda had ever loved him, he certainly didn't anymore. 

Hinata pulled his boxers back up and rolled onto his side, facing the wall. He was going to have to try and sleep again, sooner or later. 

And he wouldn't think about Komaeda.


End file.
